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‘I Should Be Dead’: Former Portsmouth Striker Opens Up on Addiction Battle

Anande_Kur Nguuma by Anande_Kur Nguuma
December 4, 2025
in FOOTBALL
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Former Portsmouth striker Mark Henshaw has revealed the full extent of his long-hidden battle with addiction, admitting that he “should be dead” after years of alcohol dependency and prescription drug misuse spiralled out of control following his retirement from football.

Henshaw, now 39, spent two seasons at Fratton Park between 2010 and 2012 and was once regarded as one of the club’s most promising young forwards. But in an emotional interview with the Hampshire Chronicle, he said the end of his career “left a hole nothing else could fill”.

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According to Henshaw, the downward spiral began after a recurring knee injury forced him into early retirement at just 28. What started as increased reliance on painkillers soon merged with heavy drinking, leading to years of secrecy, isolation and financial trouble. “I went from training every day to sitting in a flat alone, drinking from morning to night,” he said. “There were days I woke up and genuinely wondered how I was still alive.”

Henshaw admitted that, at his lowest point, he suffered a seizure linked to alcohol withdrawal, which became the wake-up call he desperately needed. “That was the moment I realised this wasn’t just sadness — it was addiction. I needed help,” he added.

He has now been sober for 18 months after entering a rehabilitation programme supported by the Professional Footballers’ Association. Henshaw says he is determined to use his experiences to help others, launching a community initiative aimed at supporting young athletes dealing with mental-health pressures.

Portsmouth FC released a statement praising Henshaw’s courage, noting: “Mark will always be part of the Pompey family. We admire his honesty and resilience, and we fully support his ongoing recovery.”

Henshaw hopes that speaking publicly will encourage other former players struggling in silence. “Footballers aren’t invincible,” he said. “If my story helps even one person ask for help, then it’s worth it.”

Tags: Portsmouth fc

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